Thursday, November 16, 2017

Fun Bus Detour

Drawn as super heroes in masks and capes.
Because the Fun Bus is still the Fun Bus even while detoured...

We had to cram in five episodes of Stranger Things Season 2 in two days, because we simply couldn't put that on hold over the weekend. Naynuh also threatened us with certain death if we watched it without her at the hospital. We then stayed up half the night finishing the taped episode of Dancing with the Stars the semifinals episode. #priorities

This is known as "planning" in Johnsonville.

We have made more inappropriate jokes in the past week than maybe all year combined. Here are some of the more horrifying examples:

Coping in Johnsonville” aka 
“Quotes after the Crying Stopped”


Elaina: “Let’s rent a movie from Redbox this weekend for when you come home.  I wonder if they have The Fault in our Stars?”
Me: “Or maybe A Walk to Remember?”
Dad: “Or Dying Young with Julia Dogface Roberts.”
Elise: “Y’all can stop being helpful now.” 
                           ************

Nana: “Been there. Done that. Have the T-Shirt.”
                    *************

Me: “You realize this is like the biggest ‘get out of jail free’ card ever? You can say anything and then finish with pointing to yourself and saying, ‘cancer’. What are they going to do?”
                     **************

Steve: “Should we call Make a Wish now or later? We want a good spot on the list.”
                      **************

Elaina: “Can I have your room? Like you know, if something happens?”
                     **************

Elise: “So, if I want out of something I can just plead, ‘My nodes are killing me today’.”
                     **************

Big E: “Does this mean I’m going to die a virgin?”
Carter: “Nah, I know an entire basketball team. Let’s make a list. I'll get the yearbook.” 
Big E: "But like there are only five boys in the senior high on the varsity squad and you are one of them." 
Carter: "I'm not going on the list, E." 
Big E: "CARTER!"
Insert giant eye roll here. 
Elaina: "If it comes down to it there are more senior high players on the GIRLS varsity squad..."
Big E: "ELAINA!"
         **************

Elise to Liam: “Liam! This means you have to be my real boyfriend not my fake boyfriend anymore, because if you reject me you’ll be that guy who rejected the girl with cancer. Not cool, Man. Not cool. I wonder who will play you in the movie version.” 
         **************
Poor Liam the Fake Boyfriend. He doesn't stand a chance.

Me: “Hey! You might actually get on The Ellen Show now!” 
          **************

Elise: “I now get my own trauma story.  I get to be an anecdote! Finally!”
         **************


Elaina: “Oh, great. Now I’m going to lose my spot as Grandbear’s favorite.”
         *************

Me: “Know how you keep asking to shave your head and I keep saying no? Well…”
         **************

Steve: “Nana can now use all of those hats she’s been crocheting for a fund raiser. I vote we call it ‘Hats for Hope’.”
        **************

Me: "I think that you should let Lillian draw your eyebrows on every morning according to your mood." 
Big E: "Nah, I'd have to keep calling her back in my room to change them every five seconds." 
Lilly: "I could just draw them on stickers..." 
Insert Long Pause
Big E: "That's actually brilliant." 
         **************

Carter: “That bucket list we’ve been making for the last couple of years suddenly means so much more now.”
         **************

Me: “So I take it back; driving ISN’T the scariest thing you will do as a teenager. Who knew?”
          **************
Steve: “Elise always did like being the center of attention.” 


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