Monday, November 28, 2011

30 Days of Thankful--Day 29--Friendships

I have a lot of acquaintances. I also have a lot of people around me that know too much personal information about me (and I don't care). But I don't have a lot of close friends. It's hard to develop friendships in ministry.
Me and Jeri. What is up with my
hair and why didn't someone say
People put on their "I'm with the pastor's wife" persona, and that's a tough nut to crack. No one wants to cuss in front of the preacher's wife. Or have a messy house. Or burp. Or admit that they know the words to AC/DC's Dirty Deeds album. (I think they dial the Jesus Channel up for the first time on the car radio if they have to drive me somewhere.)

And if you won't let your guard down, it's awfully hard to let mine down. So, The Husband and I made a decision long, long ago that we'd just be us and let God figure out who likes us and who doesn't. As a result, I'm the same all of the time; whether or not you can handle that is your problem. (Because I DO know all of the words to the Dirty Deeds album, and my dial goes to eleven.)

Lilly, Memaw, and Carter--
we don't get to see her
nearly enough!
I've been known to let an expletive fly. I've been known to poot and blame it on the dog. I've been known to smile and nod like I'm listening when I've actually dozed off on you. I don't return texts or emails in a timely manner. I can barely find my cell phone, much less keep it charged, so it's like a miracle if you happen to catch me with it in any kind of proximity. I don't call to "see how you are". If we want to do something, I have to put it on the calendar four weeks out, or I don't have time for you.

I'm on a tear about something half of the time, and I've got my face buried in a book the other half. I have family obligations, church obligations, The Husband obligations, work obligations, school obligations, Shortie's overwhelming sometimes. And some of this is preacher's wife stuff; some of it is just Charlotte stuff. It's terrible to admit this, but I am an awful friend.

So, today I am thankful for everyone who loves me anyway.

Lynn and Tracy
Tracy is going to have a stroke if I don't learn how to text her back, but I'm confident that she loves me anyway. I swear I'm going to actually attempt to keep a charge on my phone and check it at least once daily. :-)

Jeri is going to think I've fallen off the face of the earth if I don't call her and check on her, but I'm confident that she still loves me anyway. I've got you the funniest card ever sent to someone who has been ill, and when you get it you are going to laugh out loud--I'm talking snorting laughing. I'm going to attempt to mail it this week, and I'm going to call you about going to lunch over the Christmas holidays.
Kayce and Me, NYC

Kayce probably thinks we are never going to dinner again, but I'm confident that she still wants to go when I have time and that she still loves me anyway. I've got consignment store fever again, and she's got the cure, so when I call you get in the car and we'll be off on another adventure!

Gretchen and Summer
Summer, I'm still praying for you, Girlfriend, and I swear I'm coming to see the new house. I'm confident that she still loves me anyway.

Laurel is just as busy as I am so she's probably worrying that I don't love her anymore either, but I still love her and know that she still loves me anyway. I'm coming to see One Night in Bethlehem, Girlfriend, because I know you're up to your eyeballs in it by this time. Can't wait to see you for five seconds that night! :-)

Me, Kathy, Lela
 Lela? Lela! Hello? Is this thing on? Let me know when and where. :-) I'm confident that you still love me anyway.

Jenny and her super
fun self

Jenny is still waiting on that girl's night out that we've talked about for an age, but I am confident that she still loves me anyway. And we'll go this year--movies, shopping, sitting and staring into the quiet. I promise two things: one, no kid-friendly foods and two, no clean up duties afterwards.

Shelley? Wherever you are, Girl, I still love you.

This is hardly an exhaustive list. You get the point.

Lilly and Shelley

Friendships take work. And time. And mutual disclosure. I  need to work harder at cultivating my girl friendships. But even though I am a terrible friend, I am thankful that God has blessed me with people who are amazing friends to me even when I am not an amazing friend back.

Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.

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