In Fun.

 So, my son’s truck was inadvertently vandalized by some kids who were yard rolling last weekend. Rolling is a long standing tradition in our little community. The rules are fairly straightforward. You are careful not to cause any damage. Stick to things that are easily cleaned up. The month of October is the only time it’s acceptable. And you never, ever tell who, when, or where you rolled. 

We woke up on a Sunday morning to find that the rollers who visited our house had only targeted my son’s truck (another fairly common occurrence when you have teens in your house). The only problem is they pulled down a gigantic, dead limb onto his truck, which caused major damage. It caved in the roof of the truck, dropping everything in the ceiling console into the seat. It left a body-sized dent in the hood, shattered the windshield, and left bat-sized dents in both of the front panels to the left and right of the hood. It scratched the two sides of the truck when the giant limb fell onto the truck. The limb caused $5600.00 of damage to my son’s vehicle.

 He lives at U Mobile, so he had to drive back to school in the damaged vehicle, rent a car on his own for the first time through the insurance company, find and drop the vehicle at the body shop, and get a ride to all of these events. He will also be without his beloved truck for several weeks, literally because someone else was playing a little joke on him.

 I have had at least seven phone calls to insurance company, rental company (when my son had to wait four hours in their office for his rental to arrive and miss classes), to the body shop, back to the insurance company, to the police to file a report, etc.  Not to mention the $1,000 deductible. It’s a nightmare. 

Not only that, but the limb falling down required us to hire a tree service to come out and cut down the tree in question because it started leaning. So, $2,300 later, the tree is down. 

The morning we discovered the damage, I immediately posted on facebook and sent a text to several of the students who might be in the know, and within about two hours of those contacts, I had two separate individuals come forward and admit fault without throwing the other party under the bus. I told the boys who contacted me the truth—I’m not actually mad. But the second that limb fell, someone should have been at the door or left a note on the truck. I’m also thankful they admitted fault so quickly and came forward WITHOUT THROWING THE OTHER PERSON THERE UNDER THE BUS. They didn’t tattle—they admitted their own fault. I told them it was scary and brave and man stuff, because it was. When you do wrong, you have to admit it and move forward.

 But this is the point I really want to make—sometimes we do something “in fun” but it causes real life tangible damage to other people. My son was devastated about his truck. He has been put out for weeks because of someone’s “fun”. I have been put out for weeks because of “fun”. My pocketbook has been seriously dented because of someone having “fun”. Sometimes when we mean no harm, but we still cause harm, it leaves an impact that was unintentional, but still real. 

And this entire thing was about a vehicle—an inanimate object. What about when the damage done “in fun” is to a person? 

 I guess I want to say this—be very careful about what you post online, how you talk about other people, teasing disgusted as bullying, snide comments made behind people’s backs, gossiping, backbiting, making jokes at other people’s expense—because that line between “fun” and “mean” is razor thin and always cost both parties a price neither intended to pay. 

 Oh, and consider this—when I found that truck damaged my first phone call was to the police to file a report. The second was to the insurance company. Both phone calls were made within ten minutes of finding the damage. If I find that you damaged another person under my care “in fun” I assure you that I will take care of that situation exponentially faster and more violently than I did for the truck. We have too much else after us on a daily than to be afraid that our friends are going to harm us “in fun”.  

Think before you post. Think before you comment. Think before you do anything “in fun” that might cause actual damage to another person.