I Am Offended--GET OUT!!!!!

Wear it, tattoo it--whatever.

Well, it's finally happened.

Someone I know was walking in the local Wal-Mart and was asked to leave the store because his shirt design had a Rebel Flag on it and someone was offended by it. I don't care what you believe--this is America and it is my right to offend whoever I dadgum well want to offend so long as I don't infringe on their RIGHTS as Americans.

(Don't say 'dadgum'; it's offensive.)

How is it infringing on anyone's right to shop in the stupid Wal-Mart because of what someone else in the store happens to be wearing????

(Don't use the word 'stupid'; it's offensive.)
 

If you want to be gay, knock yourself out.

Here's the answer class: It doesn't infringe on anyone.

(Gay people better hope like heck that removing people who are wearing offensive clothing isn't a two-way street or they can't wear any pride gear into the Wal-Mart, because if half the populous in any given Wal-Mart has on camouflage, you are offending some folks. How'd you like to be asked to leave 'cause of that rainbow, eh? Not so much? That's what I thought.)

(Don't say 'heck'; it's offensive.)

Lots of things offend me. I now intend to tell you what they are publicly so you all can stop doing them. And if you don't stop, I'm going to find the manager and ask that you be removed from wherever you are so that I'm not offended anymore.

 

Dude on a plane was asked to get off because this image on his t-shirt was deemed offensive. Hello? Stupid person who didn't get the Princess Bride joke is OFFENDING ME BY BEING TOO STUPID TO RIDE BESIDE ME IN THE PLANE. GET OUT!!!!!

Like these things are offensive for instance: 

If you don't slap your screaming child right in the mouth when he/she is whining for something in the check out--YOU ARE OFFENDING ME BY BEING A CRAPPY PARENT!!! GET OUT!!!

(Don't say 'crappy'; it's offensive.)

If you are wearing white shoes after Labor Day---YOU ARE OFFENDING ME BY HAVING ABSOLUTELY NO FASHION SENSE!!!! GET OUT!!!!

IF I can see any part of your undergarments through, beside, or under your actual clothing--YOU ARE OFFENDING ME BY BEING A COMPLETE SLEAZE!!!!!   GET OUT!!!!

If you have a tattoo that is of any kind of cartoon character--YOU ARE OFFENDING ME!!!! GET OUT!!!!! (Because you're sort of lame, dude.)

I am OFFENDED by these things, and you need to stop them immediately.

Slytherin are offended by this flag.

I am also offended by bad grammar, bad spelling, a general lack of common sense, people who don't wear deodorant, people who don't like Harry Potter, people who say they love the Lord and post foul-mouthed rants against people of any kind, jacked-up trucks (because they look ridiculous), hybrid cars (because they look ridiculous), beets, people who say they are "fixing to" do anything, people who say, "Well, I'm a Christian, we don't do that."

YOU ARE OFFENDING ME--GET OUT!!!!!

And I have yet another reason never to step into a Wal-Mart again. (Thank Goodness.)

If you want to be gay--GO BE GAY! (That's between you and God and has really nothing to do with me.)

If you want to tattoo the rebel flag on your face--GET THAT TATTOO! (You're an idiot, but whatever, this is America and it's your face--do what you'd like with it.)

(Don't say 'idiot'; it's offensive.)

If you want to be Muslim, Christian, Buddhist--BUDDY, KNOCK YOURSELF OUT! 

BUT LEAVE ME AND MINE ALONE AND STOP TELLING ME WHAT TO DO SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU ARE SO WEAK AND IMMATURE THAT YOU CAN'T GO ON WITH YOUR LIFE WITHOUT TORMENTING ME OUT OF ENJOYING MINE!

Praise Jesus, Hallelujah, Pass the Tylenol.  That is all.